I’ve always tried my best to live an authentic life, which is why I’ve made my own choices. Of course, at times, I’ve had to choose the practical route. But now, I’m going to actively stay away from anything that feels wrong to me. More importantly, I’m going to avoid or at least limit my exposure to things that make me want to die – and this includes work. Isn’t it funny how even in dystopian times we are supposed to function as usual at work? But I digress.
This may translate to working lesser hours, turning down assignments I’m not interested in, or saying no to projects I cannot handle at the moment. I don’t care if it makes me seem lazy in the eyes of those who don’t believe in depression. I know my truth, I know this is an act of self-preservation. I’m highly depressed and as a result, way more suicidal than ever. All thanks to the pandemic.
Ideally, I’d like a vacation with my family but here in India, that’s only an option for the uber privileged. Regular people are barely stepping out of their homes these days.
I’m also unhappy about the writing field because it doesn’t pay enough in proportion to the amount of labor involved. Any interesting, weird ideas on what I can do in addition to writing? Of course, I won’t be pursuing a second career right away, but it’d be nice to have some lucrative options in mind.
And yes, please let me know how you are coping with the pandemic.